Another Summer Sunday, lazy hazy days filled with the smell of beer. Our group assembled in Kenyon Park on the advice of hares, Dog Snatcher and JustAnthony. After some obligatory chalk-talk about arrows, circles and dead hares, the group ambled off. Following a false trail northwards we ran into MoanerLisa, who had wisely decided to run 16 km to the start in the heat of the day. Regrouping we headed southwards deeper into rural OK Falls. After overcoming a tricky creek crossing filled with poisonous snakes, we came upon a grassy field with a shady tree and a cooler full of beer. The Beer Check! A game of football broke out among those who obviously hadn’t run hard enough.

Nourished, the pack gained momentum and blindly wandered about the field. Someone finally mentioned that they’d seen marks on the way in and we headed back the same way. The FRB’s fulfilled their roles and sprinted past the arrow turn. We waited till they were about half a mile away and then called them back. Winding around some more in the suburbs we eventually made it back to the highway and at high risk to ourselves sprinted across and back into the park.

Downdowns were issued to the following miscreants:

Hares Dogsnatcher and spouse JustAnthony for unbelievably dangerous creek crossings, dangerous trails, I could go on.
Snatchshot – Uttering non-hasher names.
Blowflex – Trying to give the hash-shit away at the beginning of the run.
MoanerLisa – Arriving late and uttering non-hasher names.
Mantracker – Uttering non-hasher names. (Is nothing sacred in this group?)
Philthy – Trying to engage the R.A. in a race, and I think beating him.
JustCole – For being so experienced at being in a sportsfield and still being unable to find the marks leading off of it.
JustNick & BlowFlex – FRB’s blowing past yet another mark. (see previous hashes)
BlowFlex – JustNick called up Blowflex and showed off her fancy schmancy ‘Ultraman’ race cap to the crowd. For shame.
JustNick was then named ‘CumQuad’ in honour of his “accident” at the Barking Parrot. (See Hash 97)

The hashers then retired to the trestle for diving, swimming and other water-related activities. From there it was off to Tickleberry’s, home of the world’s largest line-up and apparently ice cream. And they all lived happily ever after. On-On!

Scribed by Philthy  (On Bloody On)

There was no telegram from the Queen, no founding fathers and no birthday cake to help celebrate Penticton’s 100^th Hash. But, a warm fuzzy feeling was felt by all as we downed peach schnapps under a burning Okanagan sun. We assembled at Columbia School -there was Goatbag (the hare), Philthy (RA), Mantracker, Blow-Flex, Prize-Prick (visiting from Victoria) and a whole bunch of justs: Stan, Myranda, Leslie, Nick, Viki, Carrey and Ed.

The Goat once again baffled us with hieroglyphic flour talk and then asked for a 5 minute start. He got the full 5 as the hashers were a little sluggish after the schnapps ….and little did we know but the pesky hare had run around the block and was hiding behind the school waiting for us to leave.

And, so we ran in circles around subdivisions, up steps and hills, until eventually we were on trails, picking our way through cacti patches and snake terrain while vultures circled. There were Holds which kept the FRBs in sight and a hymn check – we desperately wanted to sing Happy Birthday but it came out like 10 green bottles of beer. The choir scattered painfully aware that none of us could sing worth a shite.

We headed down a trail past a big rock curiously labelled BR (probably meaning Bloody Rubbish) a reference to our hashing or singing ability. It would have been a great place for a photo, but the graffiti ruined the shot, and so on we raced, reflecting on an opportunity missed or ruined.

Before long we were traversing Ellis Creek and with wet shoes we waddled on up toward the dam. The trail took us across a bridge and then back through the creek, but 3 smart hashers were not fooled and zenned smugly to the front.

The beer was near and the BC soon arrived by the cool reservoir. The Goat was there with beer and snacks. We relaxed peacefully supping ale while admiring rock formations. Blow-Flex, by now bored by the lack of movement, decided it was time to relieve justStan of the Hash Shit. The RA agreed and ordered that Blow-Flex take it. ‘No, that’s not what I meant!’ she cried….. but it was too late and we took off running back down the hill!

Soon we were back in civilization and on Carmi Ave. where we headed west and down to Goatbag’s place for the On-In: Down Downs + a naming ceremony.

Down Downs –

Goatbag for being a shitty hare.

justStan and Blow-Flex for the usual FRB stuff and running with hydration backpacks containing no alcohol.

justNick for showing off his FRB skills only downhill + not feinting during a hash.

JustViki, justCarrey and Philthy for avoiding the creek by zenning.

JustViki was named: Snatch-Shot (a reference to her Hash Flash skills….I think?!)