The last Sunday hash of the Shiggy Dusters was blessed with good weather and a good turnout. The illustrious hare, Fartacus, instructed the pack in some of the finer details of South East Asian geography. Then, in lieu of chalk talk, he handed out some envelopes, scratched the ground with his foot, threw flour in Goatbag’s face, and ran off.

After a decent interval the pack followed. Just Cheryl lead the way over a dirt road and then through hill and dale. It soon became apparent that ticks are in season, both Shunty and Goatbag discovered new friends. After following a road for a while, the trail lead past an impromptu shooting range and then up a steep incline. The FRBs followed Just Cheryl, while the DFLs followed Goatbag. Goatbag proved to be the wiser as the climb was less steep (though StairsHard whinged about it) and led the DFLs onto the trail.

The trail, well road, led up a very steep incline. As the pack climbed the hare taunted them with both texts and flour messages. “OMG bet ur tired LOL!”

The pack then came to a strange check. It clearly led to the west but soon vanished. Despite the wide ranging explorations of Just Cheryl and Philthy the trail could not be picked up again. Philthy even instructed Goatbag to text the hare with a nice Fuck off. Stinky eventually the trail again, inexplicably on the east side of the road.

The trail led along a beautiful section of single track. For some odd reason the message “Text?” was left on the trail. “OMG Im like, way ahead of U!” The pack gathered for a lovely view shot and Goatbag received a text regarding kayaks and had to leave the group. Fortunately he missed the debacle that was to come.

The first bad omen was Long N Hard’s terrible tumble. As she celebrated (rightly) at the beer near mark, her foot caught a rock and down she went. She was back on her feet with just a grimace. The whole pack was soon grimacing once they discovered that there were only 1, 2, 3 , 4 beer at the beer check. That is if you can called bud light lime a beer.

Stairs Hard spotted the hare hiding behind a rock. Just Meggan (two gs), Hard To Swallow and Shunty followed the hare down some  rocky terrain while the rest of the pack gagged back their “beer” and followed the flour. Both groups soon met up on the trail again.  It was not long before the fellowship was once again sundered.

A confusing back check split the group. One  group finally blew through the back check and continued down the mountain, eventually cutting through a friendly’s citizen’s yard to get back to the vehicles.

The other  group,  caught up with the hair (now on a bike) at a well marked pulpit. The hare wanted to have a prayer but the pack only cursed him for the lack of beer. The hare then led the pack through an archery range and eventually after much wandering in the wilderness to his back yard. There a mighty feast was laid by Fartacus and his family with drink and food aplenty. Copious amounts of free beer soon drowned all sorrows.

Down downs were then handed out but this report is almost now as long as the run itself so only the all important naming will be mentioned.

Due to a scolding email sent by Speedstick in which he instructed the pack in the proper spelling of his lovely name, Just Meggan (two gs) was dubbed G-Spot so that no hasher would forget the extra G.

Welcome G Spot!

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The Shiggydusters took their show on the road this weekend and journeyed to the little village of OK Falls, just south of Penticton. We circled up outside of the OK Falls hotel, a popular stop for bikers going past and I don’t mean the spandex breed. Special celebrations were in order as Grandmaster Shunty presented GoatBag and Long ‘N Hard with commemorative shooters for their 69th and 21st runs. Spermie and JustKirstin were the hares of the day and proceeded to explain the hash. We had a local virgin in the form of JustChris, an experienced trailrunner, who’s skill we would most likely need as there was bound to be shig.

Off we went and sure enough we climbed into the hills and onto the trail system. The hares had been ogling HardToSwallow in his denim duds and kidnapped him but sure enough they appeared at the trailhead to shout abuse at the hashers. The trail meandered along a hillside and then began to climb up. After stopping for some random photo-ops and not being punctured by cacti, the group picked up steam and headed into the interior. Like extras from Bonanza, the Hashers deftly avoided cattle, jumped fences and poo following the hares finely marked trail. JustChris and Speedstick did well as FRB’s though JustChris wasn’t as vocal with the calling despite the R.A’s ministrations. Passing by a very large rock, Goatbag paused for a photo-op ontop and then Philthy had to pose beside a colossal tower he seemed drawn to. We finally encountered the hares and H2S nearing civilization and the road appeared and soon after the beer check where we also circled up.

Down-downs were presented to:
Hares Spermie and JustKirstin for leading us on a wild cattle drive full of hills, cacti, hills, fences and did I mention hills?
Speedstick - for luring us with a photo-op to a cactus tree.
JustCheryl - for using non-hasher names and then calling everyone else on breaking hasher traditions.
Philthy - for holding at all the checks and not checking due to his dodgy ankle (now in it’s 6 month of dodginess).
JustMeggan - for using non-hasher names (for shame).
JustChris - For being a virgin and not being vocal with calling out the markings.
Stinky - Normally he is late to the hash, today he didn’t show up at the carpool as promised so he made us late and showed up on time.
HardToSwallow - For creating a new Hasher fashion trend with denim jeans.
Long ‘N Hard - For being a tattler on Philthy. On a sidenote, HardToSwallow was asked to join her as he tattled on her. This could go on forever.
Shunty - For distracting the RA by whining about his toes and general lack of fitness the entire way.
Goatbag - For running ‘At the Speed of Shunty’ and still missing marks.
After circling up we gathered up our meager possessions and ran back down the hill to the little village of OK Falls where we drank and ate and made merry.

Y’all come back, y’hear?

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