Nine foolhardy hashers assembled for the 2010 World Cup Final Hash. The hour was unsociable (9am) and the bars closed as Goatbag welcomed 3 virgins (justNick, justEd and justJodi). While Spain and Holland were warming up on a cool winter day in Johannesburg the hashers sweltered under the Okanagan sun.

The hare (Goatbag) did the usual boring chalk/flour talk and once convinced that chasing virgins had little idea what he was talking about, he asked for a 5 min head start and disappeared on a lonely Campbell Mtn trail. The chasing pack ever patient obliged by giving him 3 minutes and then set off like stampeding bulls with a taste for tulips.

It wasn’t long before we were lost and cheating. The hare had been sighted up ahead, but ‘up’ was literally up and we slowed as though forced to wear clogs. The hare would slow us some more with a World Cup trivia competition that justViki would skilfully win, probably by guessing.

When we eventually made it to the summit of Campbell Mtn a small orange sphere and a tiny football pitch awaited us. The devious hare would slow us down, even further, by instructing us to play a game of football (that’s soccer for you foreigners)– two teams were chosen: Philthy and justLeslie versus Long & Hard and justEd. It was an interesting spectacle and was uncanningly like the World cup final where the Dutch decided to kick the crap out of the skillful Spanish. But, unlike the Spanish Philthy’s team was upended, unable to find any justice from the Australian ref who thought we were playing Australian Rules footy.

Once the final whistle was blown we were on our way down the mountain looking for beer and shade. Our rapid descent was halted only for a quick rendition of ‘We are the Champions Hashers’ which was sang with much enthusiasm (probably because we were on the way down).

The beer check awaited us at the end where down-downs were administered as follows –

Goatbag for being a shitty hare.
justNick for travelling halfway around the world to join us.
justViki for getting the hump about having a camelback.
JustEd for building ugly powerlines in the valley.
justShelie for fouling the RA.
justPhilthy for do nothing wrong (as usual).

And, then it was off to The Parrot to watch the 2010 World Cup Final and wait for the bars liquor license to kick in at noon F@#%*#*%#*

Scribed by Philthy (On-bloody-On)

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